Salaams and Good Morning !

Here is your daily dose of Wisdom for Living Your Best Self!

We have talked at length about how apologies can easily go wrong and fail to make amends for our slips and mistakes.

Now let us look at what does make a good apology and why it matters.

Harriet Lerner puts it so well:

"I’m sorry" are the two most healing words in the English language. When they are spoken as part of a wholehearted apology, these words are the greatest gift we can give to the person we have offended. Our apology can help free the hurt person from life-draining anger, bitterness, and pain. It validates their sense of reality by affirming that, yes, their feelings make sense, we get it, and we take full responsibility for our words and actions (or our failure to speak or act). A heartfelt apology allows the hurt party the space to explore the possibilities of healing instead of just struggling to make sense of it all.

Isn’t that so powerful?

It is true that the hurt person has their own journey of forgiveness and they will take it in their own time and in their own way.

When the offender refuses to apologize though, the hurt person must use their energy and struggle to make sense of it as the offence goes against the human instinct for fair play. They will spend countless hours trying to make sense of what happened. They will question themselves and their understanding of reality.

And when the offender does take responsibility, it greatly lightens the cognitive and emotional load on the hurt party. Their sense of order and fair play is restored. Their world begins to make sense again. They begin to understand that people make mistakes and sometimes do things to hurt others. They can now go ahead and process the hurt and pain and begin to let go of it.

What a beautiful gift to make their path of healing and forgiveness easier.

Wishing you a day full of positivity, purpose and peace.
Warm blessings


Just joining? You can catch up here

Please share today's Wisdom...your friends can sign up using this link

Lots more resources on living your best self

Have you listened to the podcast yet?
Family Connections Podcast

Here are some book recommendations on learning how to apologize

Why Won't You Apologize?: Healing Big Betrayals and Everyday Hurts by Harriet Lerner PhD, Cassandra Campbell, et al.

Sorry About That: The Language of Public Apology. By Edwin Battistella

When Sorry Isn't Enough: Making Things Right with Those You Love by Gary Chapman and Jennifer Thomas

Art of the Apology: How, When, and Why to Give and Accept Apologies by Lauren M. Bloom

Effective Apology: Mending Fences, Building Bridges, and Restoring Trust by John Kador

On Apology by Aaron Lazare

The Power of Apology: Healing Steps to Transform All Your Relationships by Beverly Engel

The Five Languages of Apology by Gary Chapman

Stay Connected

Email Marketing by ActiveCampaign