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Salaams and Good Morning !

Here is your daily dose of Wisdom for Living Your Best Self!

When negative thinking patterns become habitual, and remain unconscious, they have the potential to impact our mental health and our relationships.

There is lots of evidence in psychology around how cognitive distortions correlate to symptoms of depression and anxiety. The renowned psychiatrist, researcher and best selling author David Burns goes one step further. He says:

"I suspect you will find that a great many of your negative feelings are in fact based on such thinking errors."

So negative emotions, including depression and anxiety, go hand in hand with distorted thinking. If we are frequently suffering from negative emotions, it would be very useful to look at our thinking patterns and see if we can recognize the link between particular thoughts and emotions and then work to change them.

When distorted thoughts show up in relationships, they have a huge potential to cause harm. Imagine your spouse suggests that you go out for dinner. If you have a habit of negatively interpreting their behaviour you might assume, for example, that they are suggesting dinner out because they don’t have to cook.

As you can imagine, just working on communication skills (which many people believe are the root cause of distress in relationships) will not be enough if the thoughts behind our communication are distorted. In other words, communication starts not with the tongue but in the heart and with thoughts. In order to build trust and intimacy in our relationships, it would be wise to recognize unhelpful patterns of thinking so that we can begin to address the cause behind so much relationship distress.

Wishing you a day full of positivity, purpose and peace.
Warm blessings

Marzia  

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Please scroll down for a list of recommended books on building your emotional intelligence
 
 
 
 
 
Lots more resources on living your best self www.marziahassan.com

Have you listened to the podcast yet?
Family Connections Podcast

Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy by David D Burns, MD
The good news is that anxiety, guilt, pessimism, procrastination, low self-esteem, and other "black holes" of depression can be cured without drugs. In Feeling Good, eminent psychiatrist, David D. Burns, M.D., outlines the remarkable, scientifically proven techniques that will immediately lift your spirits and help you develop a positive outlook on life.

Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ by Dr. Daniel Goleman.
Touching on psychology and neuroscience, the expert on brain and behavioral sciences, Dr. Goleman explains the crucial skills for success offered by emotional intelligence that can determine your success in relationships and work and may impact your overall health.



Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry, Jean Greaves, and Patrick M. Lencioni.

One of the most famous on this topic, this book is focused more on ways to use EQ to improve your life. You’ll find a step-by-step program for increasing your emotional intelligence that focuses on four core skills: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship management, along with activities that will help you boost each of these areas.

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey.
The classic on self-growth, this book remains a top seller and go-to for millions around the world. Taking a less conventional approach to the subject, he isn’t focused on emotional intelligence per se, but rather presents a guide for anyone looking to better understand and control their emotions. The seven habits described in his book all require an awareness and control of emotional intelligence while teaching people how to become more proactive, a big-picture thinker, manage various interaction while building more effective communication.


The Language of Emotional Intelligence: The Five Essential Tools for Building Powerful and Effective Relationshipsby Jeanne Segal.
A great
resource for finding information on using emotional intelligence to build better relationships with just about everyone in your life. Segal lays out a simple step-by-step program on how to use five basic tools of emotional intelligence to enhance your relationships through better communication, reading non-verbal cues, and gaining skills at diffusing arguments and conflicts before they get out of hand.


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