Salaams and Good Morning !

Here is your daily dose of Wisdom for Living Your Best Self!

Continuing our discussion on alternatives to the generic apology.

We generally want to apologize to people we may have unknowingly hurt to clear our own conscience and to improve our standing before the Lord.

If we are at place in our lives when we want to make amends and seek forgiveness for our actions in the past, it is a good idea to start compiling a list of people that we may owe apologies to. Of course, we do not know if they remember us, or hold things against us but this is a good place to start.

Secondly, when we reach out to someone to offer an apology, we need to make sure that it is to a specific person and not a mass message.

Thirdly, we can check in to see if and why they are upset and offer to make an apology.

This may be far more meaningful and healing than a generic apology although it does take a lot more effort and courage to do.

Here is an example:

Dear [Name]

I am going for – and you will be on my list of people to pray for. We have not seen each other for a while, and I do think of you. Sometimes I sense a little distance between us, and I wonder If I have done something to upset you. If so, would you please let me know so that we can move forward? I would appreciate the chance to make amends.

Sending something like this does not guarantee that the person will in fact respond and let us know if and why they are upset. It does, however, make it more likely that they would appreciate the honest effort at finding out if and what they are mad about rather than sending them a generic apology.

What do you think? Which type of effort are you more likely to appreciate?
Wishing you a day full of positivity, purpose and peace.
Warm blessings


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Lots more resources on living your best self

Have you listened to the podcast yet?
Family Connections Podcast

Here are some book recommendations on learning how to apologize

Why Won't You Apologize?: Healing Big Betrayals and Everyday Hurts by Harriet Lerner PhD, Cassandra Campbell, et al.

Sorry About That: The Language of Public Apology. By Edwin Battistella

When Sorry Isn't Enough: Making Things Right with Those You Love by Gary Chapman and Jennifer Thomas

Art of the Apology: How, When, and Why to Give and Accept Apologies by Lauren M. Bloom

Effective Apology: Mending Fences, Building Bridges, and Restoring Trust by John Kador

On Apology by Aaron Lazare

The Power of Apology: Healing Steps to Transform All Your Relationships by Beverly Engel

The Five Languages of Apology by Gary Chapman

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