Many of us grow up receiving all sorts of relationship advice.
Especially when we are getting married, well meaning aunties, uncles and married peers are ever ready to dish out their view of what we must do to make our marriage work.
Well meaning as these elders are, we need to ask if they understand what it takes to make a relationship work, especially in the 21st century? A time which is fast paced and distraction filled and stress inducing beyond what these well-meaning folks have encountered?
Leo Buscaglia in his great book, Love writes: "If he desired to know about automobiles, he would, without question, study diligently about automobiles. If his wife desired to be a gourmet cook, she'd certainly study the art of cooking, perhaps even attending a cooking class. Yet, it never seems as obvious to him that if he wants to live in love, he must spend at least as much time as the auto mechanic
or the gourmet in studying love."
So what Buscaglia is saying is that in order to make our relationships work, we need to study love.
And thankfully, modern relationship science has given us the tools to do just that. Decades of research have uncovered what strengthens relationships and what tears them apart. In the first decades of the 21st century, relationship science has grown up. And we now KNOW what separates the successful marriages from the unsuccessful ones.
[Some of the research may surprise you]
And here’s the good news: love isn’t just about grand gestures. It is not about the grand Instagram-able proposal, the huge engagement ring or the fancy anniversary dinner.
It’s about small, consistent actions that build trust, connection, and joy over time. It is about SMALL THINGS OFTEN.
So, are you ready to study love?
Wishing you a day full of connection, positivity and peace.
Warm blessings
Marzia
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